blog #4 chapter 15

For my last blog I chose the concept attachment style which means that when children are very young, they begin to grow an attachment on the people who raise them. They depend on nurturance, love, affection, protection, and support. I found this concept to be great because I feel that this concept is true and amazing. I believe that people grow to have this huge attachment with their primary caregiver at a young age because they are the ones who are always around for them. If a parent were never there for their child, that child would grow-up never knowing what it feels like to be loved. That child will grow-up being very distant and have a hard time finding a partner who they can love and trust. I grew-up with a huge attachment on my parents. I have been around them all my life. We do everything together. We take family vacations every year, have bbq's, go to each others sporting event or activities, have dinner as a family, and talk about everything. We are a very close family that supports each other in everything that we do. We take after our parents in the way that we react to people, talk to people, our manners, and everything else that comes our way. Our parents are our role models in our family. We learn from them and love them. They are my attachment.

chapter 12 blog #2

For chapter 12 I chose the concept Reward behavior which simply means when a person is trying to influence another person by rewarding them for praising them. Growing up, I think that all of this had this done to us at least once. As for me, i remember when my parents promised me that we can all go on a cruise on year if I got all A's and maybe one B in all my classes. I worked so hard for that and when I got the grades that they wanted, we were all able to go on our cruise. This happens with people getting their drivers liscense as well. Parents tend to give rewards for doing something in their liking. For example, if a child wanted ice cream, that child had to finish all of his/hers dinner before they could have their ice cream. I sometime see myself giving rewards when a child does something great. I babysit, and when they want to do something like play the wii, I make them eat their dinner or do their homework before they can do so. Almost everyone does it.

Chapter 13 Blog #2

For the second concept I chose to do it on the term loyalty which means waiting for the relationship to get better and improve. It's about being passive and constructive. I chose this concept because I just got out of a relationship where it seemed that for a long time now, I was hoping that the relationship would get better. I felt that I wasn't that happy and never understood why. I waited to stop feeling that way because I invested four and a half years in the relationship. I am happy that I broke it off because I was waiting for something that wasn't going to go away. I did it for myself. I feel that this is something that a lot of people face. They stay in relationships in hope that people will change and their relationship would be happier. In some cases, loyalty isn't always great because sometimes we are just staying in the relationship because we are comfortable. Each situation is different though.

chapter 12 blog #1

For chapter 12 I chose to discuss the concept compliance. Compliance is when an individual changes his/hers behavior or personality because of someone else who wants that person to do so. I I chose this concept because this is the sort of thing that certain individuals tend to do when they are in a relationship. For example, say you had a friend who was always the type of person who did what she wanted when she wanted without worrying if her boyfriend would get mad then all of the. She believed in spending time with her friends and making time to do things with them. Then you start to see the changes in your friends behavior and opinions. She would start saying things such as: "I have to see if I can go to Disneyland because I haven't asked my boyfriend," or "I'm not sure if I can go to the club with you because my boyfriend gets really jealous." It gets annoying and frustrating to see your friend change everything that he/she believes in because they are afraid of being alone or loosing their partner. They give up their freedom and beliefs to accommodate the other person when they shouldn't have to. You see this happening in a lot of relationships.

blog #4 Chapter 10

For my last blog I chose to do it on platonic relationships which could be found in chapter 10. The term means having a friend in which the friendships lacks or doesn't have any sexual involvement. Two people could have an involvement but don't. I chose this concept mainly because there are many people in society that have platonic relationships. I personally have friends of the opposite sex who are strictly just my friends. If we both really wanted to be involved we would be, however, I feel that it would only ruin my friendship with that person if it doesn't seem to work out. Sure people have those certain friends who are known as "friends with benefits" but I choose not to cross the line between friendships and getting sexually or romantically involved.

Blog # 3 Chapter 11

The concept that I chose for chapter 11 was avoiding. The author describes this terminology as actually avoiding contact. It's where people don't even want to see each other becasue it only reminds them on how their relationship failed. All politeness is gone amongst each other. I chose this concept because I recently broke up with my boyfriend and at first we tried to stay friends and remain somewhat close, but then it became too much. He had gotten to the point where he didn't even want to look at me, talk to me, or be around me. I understand why, but it just sucks. All types of people experience this in their life and it's no wonder why people don' remain friends with their ex's. It happens though, and we just need to deal with it and move on.

Chapter 10 Blog #2

For my second concept, I decided to do it on relational maintenance because I feel that in every relationship that a person is in, needs to know how to maintain a great and healthy relationship. In the book there are four definitions that the author provided, but I'm only going to give this one: "to keep a relationship in a specified state or condition-for example, to keep the relationship from becoming more (or less) intimate." I feel that in order to have a successful relationship, there has to be excitement, magic, intimacy, romance, etc....People get bored easily throughout relationships, so keeping the romance alive and well, will increase the intensity and love of the relationship. If there is no repair, no romance, no excitement, the relationship will get old to a certain individual in the relationship. That person might end the relationship because there is no communication between them, or because they fight a lot and can't figure out how to get along or meet half way, it could be because they have no romance or love life, and/ore even because things have been the same for a while and that person is bored.So sustain the relationship, and keep your relationships intimate and special.